I wish women were followed by their own background music. Just like in movies where it helps give you an idea of the mood, a woman’s background music would help tell me what she’s feeling or thinking in order to prevent me from screwing things up. This would help make life so much easier like when a … [Read more...]
The Thrown of Manliness
I am a fan of the urinal. I love walking into a public washroom and seeing one there... largely because if there isn’t one, I know I’m in the wrong bathroom. That’s a horrible feeling: “Where’s the urinal? Oh no, not again.” My favourite thing about using a reverse fountain is it makes me … [Read more...]
Bring your own jacket
It has long been held that a gentleman gives his jacket to his date when she’s cold, but this is not being a gentleman; not at all. This (pause for dramatic effect) is being an enabler; he is enabling the girl to be a moron, which I say in the nicest way possible… so I guess I should throw in a :) … [Read more...]
A Hat is Not a Tuque
I have a request for the so-called men out there who do this – I’m aware that these are the men least likely to read this article... they’re also the least likely to be able to read... but guys, pleasssse, stop wearing your baseball hat like a tuque... because, well, it’s not a tuque; it’s a hat. … [Read more...]
Discussing Emotional Sex on Fox 5 Vegas KVVU
Hotel Beds: the Cuddle Maker
Why are hotel beds like a shallow canoe? I’m yet to sleep in a pay-for-the-night bed without it being more like a hammock than a mattress. Why is that? Do hotels get to order from a special category of beds in the shape of a banana: “Hi, I’d like to order from the squishy fruit addition?” Even a … [Read more...]
Lessons from the Shower
I was recently staying in a hotel and was using the shower; don’t worry I’ll keep this clean... get it? Clean? That`s a pun with hints of being dirty; again, a pun. Does it get better than this? Hopefully... that’s sarcasm... or is it? (All this banter; I really need to lay off the Gilmour Girls). … [Read more...]
Evidence that we love pets more than people
I was recently at Walmart - please don't judge me; it was an emergency - and i overheard a woman asking a worker: "Is this the healthiest dog food? I only want the best for my smooshy." It made me feel good to hear someone care so much about their dog, but a little while later i saw her waddle her … [Read more...]